That Was Her; This Is Me

You know how you think you get over things? But you really don’t. You only think you’re over it.

Before you can move forward in life, you have to take time to reflect on the good and bad from before, to understand what didn’t serve you, to understand what you’re leaving behind. You have to look at what the previous era was for you in order to move clearly into the new one.

Just yesterday, I really felt the pain of the era I just came out of. California. LA. I was having a hard time processing it.

I moved to LA in July of 2003 from New York City. I moved without a plan, only seeking new beginnings after college and a place to further my career. “Another big city,” I thought. “Great! Let me see what’s out there!”

I set about doing what any recent college graduate does: working my way up the career ladder. I chose jobs based on the job title and what it looked like from the outside—District Sales Manager, Regional Account Manager, Sales and Brand Marketing Manager. My decision-making process usually involved asking myself questions like, “Do I need to start applying to sales director jobs now because that’s the next position?” and “Should I go to that company with that better product?”

The thing is, each position was unfulfilling. I kept thinking I would find the “perfect boss” who would see something in me and help me grow my career. Instead, I just kept falling into these patterns of discontent, trying something new, not being fulfilled, then picking up and trying again, and it still not working.

The reason that nothing was working, the reason I was feeling so discontent, was that I never stepped fully into the leading role of my life and took true accountability for myself and the trajectory of where my life was going. I tried to find the answer in a career, a job, a relationship, a ministry program, the list goes on. I created this idea of the “perfect boss” who would show up and show me the way. But here’s the thing: I was the one holding myself back, and I was also the hero I had been waiting for!

When I look back on the last 17 years, I see clearly now that the Jenī in LA did not fully know her worth, her value. And that was because I was trying to cultivate purpose outside of myself, focusing on external, tangible things, like my job, my degree, my “career trajectory.” While those are all great accomplishments to celebrate, purpose is internal. Purpose is what we are brought here to do. And it's unique to each and every one of us.

I am Jenī Thomas, a Mindset Coach specializing in helping women leaders with career fulfillment, transition, and finding their place of belonging that ignites their passions, to pursue what matters most to them, so that they can live a life of impact and purpose.

Now I recognize my uniqueness for the beautiful thing it is: a gift of gold. Peeling back my layers has afforded me the opportunity to show up authentically. I’m ready to step into my true self and the authority God has given me. Whoever wants to come in is welcome and whoever doesn’t can fall by the wayside. I’m not for everybody and everybody’s not for me. In business, we all have our ideal client; in life, we all have our people that root for us, support us, and genuinely understand and accept us. When we show up clear to the world, that clarity is what you get back.

The thing is, if we don’t all step into our authentic uniqueness, then we can’t step fully into our purpose, our impact, and our contribution to the world. How will the world know what you have to offer if you don’t step up and own it?

2020 was a catalyst for transformation. Now I see the possibilities of what’s ahead, the newness of what I’m in, and I realize I don’t want to carry over any of the dysfunction or victimhood mentality from before. I’m stepping into my truest, most authentic self. Every now and then, I find myself going back to touch the pain, but I don’t stay there. Because I’ve actually seen the other side of it, and it’s really beautiful.

Are you ready to transform your pain into purpose and step into your truest, most authentic self? Set up a free Discovery Call today!
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